Love Hurts

Before I go ANY further…

CONGRATULATIONS to our men’s and women’s Olympic hockey team players/coaches/staff – you did us proud!!! What the men did for the Gaudreau children is the antithesis for today’s post. Okay, back to the regularly scheduled programming (as I wipe away a few tears of joy).

Since I lost my voice thanks to “our” (I am sure I helped in some way) OT win this morning, figured I would sit quietly down and put the finishing touches on a post I was planning on putting out back on Valentine’s Day. Traditionally, I feature the “red” feathered birds for that special someone’s day – problem was I didn’t have one of those ready to go, so I went with a series that played out last year at the Leonabelle Turnbull Birding Center. After getting most of it ready to go, I decided that wasn’t a good time to feature courtship rejection.

Love hurts, love scars
Love wounds, and marks
Any heart, not tough
or strong enough

You will understand after the jump.

A quick disclaimer – I probably took some liberties here….er maybe a bit more than some…okay, a whole HEAPFUL of assumptions, conjectures, propaganda, falsehoods, innuendo and bent story lines to fit a narrative in the name of humor – along with accompanying pictures of course. Kinda what I do hehehe.

For starters, I have no idea which is the male and which is the female Reddish Egret in this series – I do know that it is the white morph variety with it’s shaggy neck/head feathering and the black-tipped pink nose. Beyond that, let’s have some fun!

Here I stand in my best white dress and black stockings looking for the bird of my dreams to sweep me off my sexy toes.

I spy a handsome young Reddy coming my way – I shall test its manliness and commitment to the fairer sex. (drops trophy stick in the water nearby)

Well hello my dear, you appear to have misplaced your beautiful stick!

Oh, how thoughtful of you, would you mind handing that back up to me – my what a firm bill you have on you, are you from around here?

Certainly dear maiden of the Turnbull waters, worry not your heart as I shall retrieve that for you.

Thank you darling, would you be so kind to join me up here on my perch and enjoy this absolutely stunning day with me?

I would be honored to.

Oh my, what big toes you have, come closer, I want to have a looksee.

Oh, did I drop that darn stick again, why I’d swear I’d lose my head if it wasn’t attached.

You appear to have a bit of the clumsies, but I shall honor your wishes …again.

Clumsies! Did you say CLUMSIES, now you listen here smarty feathers, I happen to be the prettiest Egret here…my mirror told me so.

Shhhhhhh, the Black-Necked Stilts are looking at us funny.

I don’t care if the entire Turnbull locals and those pesky paparazzi on the boardwalks here me, you have sullied my honor with such distasteful accusations.

Some fools think of happiness
Blissfulness, togetherness
Some fools fool themselves I guess
They’re not fooling me
I know it isn’t true

Now I need you to apologize immediately or take flight from my perch and rid myself of thy condescending self.

Geez chicky, take a Minnow and calm yourself down, I was just pointing out that this routine was getting a bit old.

OLD, now you are calling me OLD – what kind of bird brain are you?

You know what, I’ve had enough of your bitchy attitude … and for the record, your big ass feathers make your butt look huge

Why I never…

Workout…yeah, I can tell.

Now the Stilts are laughing at us and that dork with the big camera over there is taking waaaayyy too many shots of us – Hey, I wonder if he had to zoom out to get your butt feathers in…

Hey Stilt-buddies, come on over here, this is turning out to be a great show.

Okay, I’ve had enough of your snarky remarks you beast of a bird, be off my perch this second – thou shall not feast your eyes on my natural beauty for another second.

Did I mention you have ugly knobby knees – look at those things ,they look like two skinny Snakes that swallowed giant egg.

Take one last look you Egretta Rufescens for I damn thee and instead save my admiration and endless love for another more deserving member of family Ardeidae.

Listen chicky, you have one hell of a bad attitude coming out of that pink bill of yours, don’t forget you asked me to come over here.

Enough, talk to the wing and begone thata-way!

Whoa, did that Egret just give that dude the wing!?!

Oh yeah, she certainly gave him the wing!

You just can’t win
And so it goes ’til the day you die
This thing they call ‘love’
It’s gonna make you cry
I’ve had the blues, the reds, and pinks
One thing for sure
Love stinks, yeah yeah

Looking back, I think I made the right choice holding off on this particular series for our traditional Valentine’s post hehehe. Valentine’s is a day to spend in the company of the one you love (Linda), not reading about dysfunctional hookups on the water. Take care everyone and stay away from those stick diggers out there or you’ll be singing right along with Nazareth and the J. Geil’s Band.

(Apologies if you are humming those songs the rest of the day ha).